Saying goodbye to stay-at-home motherhood

Becoming a student mom

Saying goodbye to middle of the week beach days, bike rides and play dates is something I find myself focusing on with all my mommy guilt. Being a stay at home mom was never a calling for me so much as the place I just assumed I'd be. I didn't take into account whether I would be good at it or whether I would love it. Now, as I prepare to put my little love in a real childcare for the first time and commence with a 5-day per week class schedule my feelings, like much of motherhood, are bittersweet. Am I making the right choice for my family? Not just for our future, but for our daily life right now? Will my little love be better off when her daily caretaker doesn't have to put on a cartoon so they can get the house clean? Or will she be torn apart when she can no longer spend mornings having a "cuddle on couch with mommy"? In reality, these worries and guilt pangs are as useless as most worries and pangs of guilt.  We have already made our list of pros and cons, we have already spent countless nights weighing our options and our dreams. I have already applied, waited impatiently and been accepted. The only thing to do now is to figure out how I will deal with the new schedule & guilt while working hard to be the mother I want to be and give my little love the childhood I've dreamed for her. I put my questions out to the lovely mom's in my holistic mom's group, mom's who strive to live a "natural" life, but who work and go to school and sometimes cook mac n' cheese for dinner. Here is the list I compiled for adjusting, for saying good-bye, for welcoming the next chapter in our lives.

Nursing School Mama Survival Guide

Make a food schedule. Not just dinners, but breakfast and lunch (or else you won't eat). Plan your favorite things for lunch (like the fixings for a caprese sandwich). For dinner, plan for all 7 nights, even though you know you will probably end up eating out. Mon: Pasta, Tues: crockpot dinner, Wed: Mexican, Thurs: real food, Fri: no cook dinner (salad, sandwich), Sat: family cook night, Sun: hubby bbq's.

Add exercise, self care and special time/activities with little love to your weekly schedule! Print schedule and post it on the fridge. We all have big goals, plans and dreams but sometimes life gets away from us. Scheduling one fun thing a day with little love will mean I will always have time to connect with her, whether it's a park stop on Monday afternoon or an art project every Wednesday. Also, I plan to do yoga everyday, but my mat remains rolled next to the couch unless I make that commitment a part of my routine. 

Simplify, Prioritize and then let things go. Nursing school isn't forever, but honestly it will always be something won't it?  Make food ahead of time and be sure to prep healthy snacks so you don't fall back on junk. Multitask, clean the bathroom while the kids bathe, do the dishes while water is boiling for dinner. Many mom's said to look at what's important to you and your family, at the end of the day is it really the end of the world if the house is cluttered or dinner is quesadilla's or mac more often than it's not? What drives you crazy (dirty dishes in the sink!), do that, and let other things go.

And the best piece of advice I received? Rather than focus on what your child is missing out on during this time, notice the things she will learn from it. She will learn how important education is, she will learn about organization and prioritization, she will learn about not giving up, about having and fulfilling our dreams. Those are beautiful things. I hope she will be proud of me.